Book: Reflections

Reflections - bringing attention to your daily life by Désirée Steinmann

More information here ...

Share |
Subscribe to RSS-Feed
Blog > Blog - Message

Reflections of the Week

Three Questions Which Can Change Everything

2014-07-18 13:18 (comments: 0)

I have recently talked to one of my clients who barely escaped death a few years ago. It was an accident; completely unexpected, shocking but in the end enriching. 
Can you just try to imagine for a moment that this could happen to you? That from one fraction of a moment to another you are facing the end? Everything has been going so well: the job, the family, the friends... You had great plans for the future, you had unfulfilled dreams, perhaps some misunderstandings waiting to be resolved......And all of a sudden all this is going to be wiped out. The end.

The person I'm talking about is a successful businessman who really has it all: great career, a picture-perfect family, great ambitions and plans. At the moment of the accident, as he thought that was going to be his end, his whole life flashed in front of his eyes (yes, I know it sounds corny, but that's how he described it). He wasn't afraid or stressed; he felt a "serene clarity" as he himself described it.

Suddenly everything shrank to only these three questions:

  1. Have I lived?
  2. Have I loved?
  3. Have I left my mark?

It is a real pity that it takes such drama to fully become aware of the importance and implications of these questions. Why does it sometimes take losing almost everything before we can understand what is truly important in life?

What does it mean: "Have I lived"? If you had to answer this question now, what would you say? What does it actually mean "to live"? Is it about efficient functioning? Is it about a conscious and aliveness? What areas of life are actually encompassed in this question?

Why don't put your life to the test and take the "Self-Test" on my website. You could then write a paragraph about how each of the areas should look like if you had the chance to consciously live your life to the fullest.

My client has changed many things after his accident. His job plays now second fiddle to his family, who has become his top priority. He has made room for more quality-time with his family and he makes sure that he creates many important and valuable moments together.  He appreciates and treasures his marriage with a new zeal because he keenly felt how important his wife is to him and how quickly he could have lost everything. His health has gained a whole new significance, too. He doesn't only use his body but he takes care of it, and he makes sure that he is in top physical condition.

The money, the TV, the Internet etc have all been downgraded on the list of priorities. The life and love have become a treasured and appreciated gift instead of being just means to an end. Everything he does is questioned if this really matters. It is more about contribution then winning - to have a positive influence - even though he is still successful and earns a lot of money! ... just with more awareness and appreciation, in every way.

Don't wait until it goes this far or until you end up in a similar situation where you might not have another chance to live your life to the fullest! Ask yourself these three questions and watch how the answers can change your life and your decisions!

I am now taking a few weeks off and look forward to stimulating you again to reflect when I return.




Difficulties come when you don't pay attention to life's whisper. Life always whispers to you first, but if you ignore the whisper, sooner or later you'll get a scream.


Oprah Winfrey


We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.

 Sir Winston Churchill


Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

Steve Jobs

Go back

Add a comment